In my program of sobriety, I am currently working on going through all of my resentments, one by one, and acknowledging why I am resentful and what my part in it is. Some of them are large resentments, and some are not. Going through the list of people who have wronged me, some of my favorites have been:
Toby: He slapped me. For no reason. When I was 6. What the fuck?
My part- NOTHING. I DID NOT DESERVE TO BE SLAPPED.
Lexie: She stole my FUCKING pen and never gave it back. What a bitch.
My part- STILL NOTHING. ALSO I WANT MY PEN BACK.
Most of my teachers: They didn’t appreciate how smart and talented I was.
My part- I never went to class, didn’t try very hard, was always hungover.
Neil: He used to bully me, but then he got SUPER hot, so I forgive him.
My part- Probably nothing. Also, call me.
That one guy on Tinder: Told me he had heard of me, and not good things either.
My part- I did all of those things that he had heard I did, so really he was just being honest. But still. What an asshole.
God: He took Princess Diana from us, He allows my mother to post things on Facebook, He created me, but He didn’t create centaurs? What the hell.
My part- I probably couldn’t do any better, plus He did make Lana Del Rey and I really can’t ask for any more than that.
Me: Ugh. Where do I start.
My part- Nothing. I take no responsibility for anything I have done.
Basically I’m just getting out everything that anyone ever did to me, but also dealing with why I am resentful and what I did to cause the situation. This is helpful because I get to deal with all of the bad stuff in my past, but also because I get to see how incredibly petty I am. Also, apparently I have a need to be liked and a need for attention? Go figure.